Donald Trump tweeted
that Time Magazine had conditionally offered him their title of “Person of the
Year” but he “took a pass.” However, it looks like the president simply
misinterpreted his recent conversation with the magazine, a leaked transcript
of which follows:
Time Magazine: Hello, sir. I’m calling
on behalf of Time Magazine. As a valued subscriber, we want to offer you a renewal
of your subscription at a very special price.
Donald Trump: Yes, of course I must be
a valued subscriber since you made me “Person of the Year” last year. I assume
you want to renew that honor for this year.
Time Magazine: I don’t know, sir. I’m just
calling from our customer service call center. Your name came up on my screen.
You are Mr. D. Trump, correct?
Donald Trump: That’s President Donald
Trump, current “Person of the Year.” Look, I’m going to make this easy for you.
You want to make me “Person of the Year” and I’m quite happy to accept. After
all, most people are saying that I’m a slam dunk for the cover.
Time Magazine: Mr. Trump, I don’t know
anything about that. If, as you say, you are president, I’m sure you’re in the
running but that’s not my department.
Donald Trump: I know you “fake media”
folks like to play coy but either I’m on the cover or not. There’s no maybe
about it so what are you offering me?
Time Magazine: Well, sir, I can offer
you a full year renewal for the low, low price of $9.99 plus tax. Or, if you
really want to save, we can renew you for three years for only $20.19.
Donald Trump: “Person of the Year” for
2018 and 2019? Fine with me but I resent that you want to charge me for this.
Time Magazine: No, sir, I have nothing
to do with “Person of the Year.” I’m just offering you an extension of your
magazine subscription.
Donald Trump: Forget it. Either I’m
“Man of the Year” or I’m not. No guarantee, no deal. Otherwise I’ll just print
my own cover. Let me speak to your supervisor.
Time Magazine: Mr. Trump? I’m José, the
call center supervisor. I understand you’re not happy with our renewal offer.
Donald Trump: That’s right, José or
whatever your name is. I was “Person of the Year” last year, I should be
“Person of the Year” this year and I should be again next year and the year
after that. Even that loser Obama was named twice.
Time Magazine: I don’t know anything
about that, Mr. Trump, except to say that, in my experience, a sitting
president only gets a second cover if he does something extraordinary like get
reelected, start a war, cause a scandal or get impeached.
Donald Trump: OK. Give me a few days.
I’ve got your number. I’ll get back to you.
(dial tone)
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