Recent conversation overheard at a local Ottawa used car lot:
STEPHEN: Hello, gentlemen. What can I do for you?
DANNY: It’s this secondhand 2005 Atlantic Accord that you sold me. It’s not performing as promised at all.
RODNEY: Mine, too.
STEPHEN: Look fellows, someone sold you both a perfectly good used car. And as far as I know, you both got a great deal at the time.
DANNY: Well, yeah, it seemed like a good deal but now it’s looking more and more like I got screwed like that hydroelectric sale we made to Quebec.
RODNEY: I’m not happy either. You said we’d get to keep the same monthly payments and not have to pay extra for gas and oil.
STEPHEN: Just a minute fellows. I wasn’t even running this lot back in 2005. As I recall, it was a guy named Paul.
DANNY: That’s right but Paul said he’d stand behind this Accord and he gave us an eight-year warranty.
RODNEY: Me, too.
STEPHEN: OK, OK. I run an honest business here and whatever contract you signed with Paul, I’ll stand behind it 100%.
DANNY: But I heard you’re now offering way better deals.
RODNEY: Yeah, I heard you’re giving some folks way nicer payment plans.
STEPHEN: That’s right, guys. In fact, I can make you the same offer today. The only change is that you’d have to pay for your own gas and oil.
DANNY: That’s not fair. Paul said we’d get great monthly payments and not have to pay for gas and oil for eight years.
STEPHEN: Sorry guys. That was Paul’s promise. I’m glad to stand behind your original contracts but if you want the new deal, you’ll have to trade in your Accord for another vehicle.
DANNY: That’s ridiculous. You want me to trade in the Accord for some little Echo or Refocus?
RODNEY: Forget it. If I can’t have my Accord and the new monthly payments, I’m walking. And I’ll be telling all my friends to vote with their feet, too.
STEPHEN: Suit yourself, boys, but you won’t find a better deal anywhere else. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a meeting with some guy from Saskatchewan named Lorne about the Accord he never got.