“Several of President Donald Trump’s outside advisers have
told him over the past week he requires neither a chief of staff nor a communications
director….”
-
CNN – March 30, 2018
Communications Director Hope Hicks is long
gone so can Chief of Staff John Kelly be far behind? Look for these upcoming
tweets from the President:
@realDonaldTrump: Goodbye John Kelly. Just like Jimmy Carter, I
don’t need a chief of staff or a communications director. No one does these
jobs better than me. Let Donald be Donald and let’s make the White House Great
Again.
@realDonaldTrump: Don’t forget; your taxes are due on April 15th.
Why does the IRS make it so difficult? I’m now the head of the agency because
I’m great at doing taxes. Nobody avoids paying taxes better than me because I
know the system so well.
@realDonaldTrump: A big thanks to Betsy DeVos for her efforts
at the Department of Education. She gets a solid C+ but America deserves an A+
and that means me. I’m the smartest guy, a real stable genius who has a real
degree from an Ivy League business school so I’ll fix our schools like real
quick.
@realDonaldTrump: Sad Scott Pruitt had to go at the EPA. Sure
he loves coal and doesn’t believe in climate change just like me but he couldn’t
keep his hand out of the till. DT for EPA and let’s get back to coal-burning
steam locomotives and a coal-fired furnace in the White House. Make America
Dark Again.
@realDonaldTrump: I appreciate your efforts as Secretary of
State, Mike Pompeo, but I no longer need your services. After all, who arranged
that+ meeting with Little Rocket Man and threatened nuclear war against Iran?
The Donald, that’s who.
@realDonaldTrump: A big thank-you and goodbye to John Bolton
for his service as National Security Adviser but I’ll take it from here and
without an ugly mustache (it’s gotta go, John; so ugly). I know national
security better than anyone so I’ll do it alone and brief myself. You’ll be so
secure you’ll be tired of being secure.
@realDonaldTrump: Ben Carson knows nothing about housing and I
know everything about housing so, no surprise, I’m the new Secretary of
Housing. Plus Ben blamed his wife for that $31,000 dining set purchase. I would
never blame my wife for anything although maybe my ex-wives. LOL.
@realDonaldTrump: I’ve always said Jeff Sessions shouldn’t have
recused himself. Well now Stupid Jeff is gone and I’m the new Attorney General.
I’m not a lawyer but I know more than any lawyer since I’ve used so many of
them over the years. If anyone disagrees, you’re sued!
@realDonaldTrump: Hey, Rod Rosenstein, I don’t need you anymore
since I’m now the AG so, guess what, you’re fired. And while I’m at it, Robert
Mueller, you’re fired, too. No collusion. Fake news. Witch hunt over.
@realDonaldTrump: I’m firing any remaining cabinet members and
I appoint myself to any vacant positions although maybe Jared can be Chief
Vassal or Court Jester or something. Since I’m like really smart, stupendously
smart, I can do it all.
@EmperorDonald: That’s right. I’ve changed my Twitter handle.
I now run the whole show. I don’t need anyone’s help except I still can’t seem
to find the nuclear football.
@EmperorDonald: Found it. I’m going to attack Iran and North
Korea. MAGA and KYAG (kiss your ass goodbye).
Twitter blows up. Trump blows up Twitter
and who knows what else.
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