Hillary Clinton’s e-mail scandal seems to be
heating up again. With the transfer of her work-related messages to the State
Department, she claimed to have met the spirit of the law.
As for the remaining e-mails, Mrs. Clinton
classified them as personal and apparently deleted them. Critics claim that
some of those messages should also have been retained for the historical
record. The following brief selection from her deleted e-mails folder lets you
be the judge:
March 15, 2009
TO: All my peeps
FROM: Hillary Rodham Clinton
Just
a quick note to all my supporters about proper e-mail etiquette. I should be
addressed as Madam Secretary, not as Madam President….at least for now. LOL
June 29, 2010
TO: Bill
FROM: Hillary
When
it comes to my 2016 run, I don’t expect a lot. A ringing endorsement would be
nice and don’t praise any other candidates. At the very least, I expect you to
abide by the prime directive: Keep it in your pants.
October 10, 2011
TO: Arturo’s Haute Couture Design
FROM: The Secretary of State
Thanks
but no thanks for the drawings with suggested new outfits for me. As usual, I
want seven different colored pantsuits, one for each day of the week. And make
them drip dry with easy care fabrics. I anticipate a lot of traveling over the
next two years and even more after that.
January 12, 2012
TO: Acme Novelties
FROM: Secretary Clinton
I
am returning your invoice and the 10,000 campaign buttons you screwed up. The
order explicitly specified “Vote for Hillary in 2016”, not “Vote for the
Hill-Billy team.”
July 5, 2012
TO: The Office of Bill Clinton
FROM: The Secretary of State
I’m
going to ask you guys one last time; get the Big Dog to stop bugging me about
being on the ticket in 2016. I know that the Constitution doesn’t prohibit it
but if I get one more e-mail or text from Bill signed “Your future VP”, heads
are going to roll!
September 22, 2012
TO:
My exploratory campaign team
FROM: Hillary
Officially,
I haven’t declared my candidacy for 2016 but, of course, it’s full steam ahead.
However, what I want you to start organizing today is my 2020 campaign. It’s
never too early to start planning for the future. Remember, don’t stop thinking
about tomorrow. J
October 2, 2012
TO: Elizabeth Warren
FROM: Hillary Clinton
It
was nice to see you again at yesterday’s function. I trust I can count on your
support if I should decide to run in 2016. Likewise, I’ll be glad to throw some
love your way in 2024. But as for now, it’s my turn, bitch. Understand?
January 2, 2013
TO: Jeb Bush
FROM: H. R. Clinton
Glad
to see you’re continuing to release your private e-mails even if it has been
six years since you were governor. Just a word of advice: think carefully about
running for President. My husband trounced your dad and if that clown Al Gore
had run on Bill’s record, your brother would still be operating a baseball team
in Texas. You can run if you want but I’ll crush you like a grape.
January 29, 2013
TO: All my staff
FROM: HRC
Thanks
again for preparing my valedictory speech and particularly the kind words about
Obama. Although we all know that I should have been President, it was the right
thing to do. At least the jerk can’t run again.
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